Love, Hope and Faith

It's been such a long time since I have posted.  I have been meaning to post for months, but I just couldn't find the words to express what was going on in my head.

In August James and I decided to try for a second baby.  It was on a whim and if it happened that month great, if not we would try one more month and then wait until next year.  (I wanted to make sure my maternity leave would start at the end of the school year)  Well it didn't happen the first month, but it did the second!  We were beyond excited!

When I was 6 weeks pregnant I knew that something was different.  I thought that this baby HAD to be a boy!  Even the Chinese calendar said boy.

At around 7 weeks I had some minimal bleeding but it stopped the next day.  I was a little worried, but knew that if something were wrong there wasn't anything I could do.  I prepared myself for the worst just in case.

We were in for a shock at our first sonogram.  We got the usual joke before she even started "You having twins?"  "No way," I said "Thats not even funny!"  She started the sono and the first thing I heard her say was "I'm so sorry." I thought she was going to tell me I had lost the baby, but then she said "It's twins."  This was something we never thought would happen to us.  We were in shock.  If you know me, you know that I am always calm and collective.  This was one moment that I was not prepared for.

All I could think of was the fact that  I have so many friends whose only wish was to have a baby and here I am pregnant with twins.  It wasn't fair.  This made it hard for me to find joy.

Don't get me wrong, I was happy.  It was just different.

It took us a few weeks to get use to the fact that our family of 3 will be 5.  We are thrilled, and scared at the same time.  There are a lot of "I don't knows"  All I do know is that God only gives us what we can handle and that He will take care of us.

Side Note- Last Sunday we went to church and the sermon was on the Lord providing!  It was just what James' and I needed to hear.   I know that everything will be ok.  This gives me great peace.

My joy is finally in my heart.  Things are finally starting to get exciting.  Mayson can't wait until the babies come!  As soon as we told her she was going to have two babies.  She told us that they were girls.  I tried to prepare her for other options but she never accepted the fact that she might have brothers.  After we found out we were having two girls we went to tell her, and she looked at us and said she already knew that.  =)  Love her!

I know our life is going to be different.  We are so blessed to have two healthy baby girls and one "little big girl" =)

Our sweet girls...